Poor and naked and blind

I accidentally read about a man who works for the cheapest organization in the world. This organization expects everything from it's employees, but expects them to fend for themselves and feed themselves and even direct themselves. It offers no benefits, doesn't even supply the resources or support to carry out the tremendous work load it lays upon its employees.

Apparently, at least in the mind of this man, this organization is the Kingdom of God.

The argument presented was that one had to limit the size of one's family due to responsible allocation of "resources". If one has many children, he offered, one cannot minister effectively.

I wondered if he and I do not read different Bibles, or even different Church history.

Just for one instance, does this mean that the Israelites should never have challenged their adversaries unless they had enough "resources"? What about Gideon, whom God told to whittle his troops down to almost nothing so that God could get the glory?

Maybe my memory is fuzzy, but I seem to have read that God became angry when the Israelites went about operating in the manner this man supposes; making sure they had everything in place before "trusting God". That is no more than trusting in the flesh. Didn't God tell us through the Apostle Paul that when we are weak, He is strong?

My wise husband calls this "EIBD"--Educated Idiot Box Disorder. It all comes down to Proverbs 3:5-6:

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

The mind can be a wonderful thing, but only as it is submitted to God. Our minds, in and of themselves, can only get us into trouble.

God's ways are not our ways, and His thoughts are far above our thoughts. How can we know in our finite minds what He has planned for the future?

In all fairness, I understand that this minister is not the first or the only to express these views. I have been friendly with enough church leaders to know how the story goes. Ministry is always "out there" somewhere, and it requires all sorts of attachments and boards and reems of paper dedicated to planning and strategizing and demographic studying.

A local leader of a para-church organization relayed an interesting story of his brush with this sort of thinking. A public relations firm approached him with the promise of being able to greatly increase the amount of donations he received. They proposed that he "pretend" to operate missions to orphans overseas, or "pretend" to be building churches for emerging world Christians (they had these pretend buildings and orphans at the ready for photo-ops, and a list of other ministries who had already used their services). This, they said, was the surest way to get people's hearts and emotions involved so that they would give more. "Just think," they argued, "of all that you could do for the Gospel with the extra money you receive!"

In other words, "Do God's work, just by man's means. Get your own resources, make your own plans. God is not smart enough or generous enough to supply or direct you."

This particular minister had always given his materials away to anyone, whether or not they were able to donate--even advertised the fact--which must have driven these PR men absolutely insane. This man's methods made no sense to them at all. Amazingly, this para-church ministry was constantly in the black, and growing steadily.

So what does this have to do with having lots of offspring?

There is no shortage of birth control in the Western world. Even if a person can't afford it, there are multiple agencies offering it free of charge. There are all sorts of different types; both the abortive and non-abortive. Every public-schooled child has been instructed and re-instructed of all that is available to prevent children being born. Pastors in almost every church are not opposed to contraception, and in fact sometimes counsel couples adamantly to use it.

And yet, inexplicably, Christians who desperately desire to serve God are throwing caution to the wind and having as many babies as God will give them. These people come from diverse backgrounds, traditional, Charismatic, Catholic, etc. Often they attend churches that do not support their decisions, and even make fun of them and accuse them of being selfish and irresponsible.

There is no nationally recognized organization or leader that is behind this movement, only a few loosely-organized entities dare to encourage these folks. Why are they doing it? Where is the impetous?

I propose that the only thing that would cause so many people to risk life and limb and reputation would be the Holy Spirit. God must have plans, plans and thoughts that go far and above the plans and thoughts of the religious leaders of our day.

No, this doesn't make sense to the human mind. It doesn't look at all like the way God "should" be moving, as if we have somehow arrived at a place so high that we can judge His ways and methods.

And this is precisely why this movement must be God. He purposely uses foolish things, and people who are willing to look stupid for Him. He passes over the wise and smart, He gives His secrets to those who know they are poor and naked and blind.

From this side of the issue I can honestly say that splitting hairs with multiple scriptures is only slightly affective in communicating the why's and wherefor's of those peering in. I instead rely on the whole counsel of God--the complete message of the entire Bible:

GOD LOVES PEOPLE--AND LOTS OF THEM!

Being open to children puts us right at the center of His heart and intentions for the earth.

Simple.

Period.

Be it ever so humble

I have posted recently about some miraculous renovations on our home--the home that is a miracle, and keeps being a miracle for us all.

But I also thought it was important to give another side to housing for the large family. There are those who have made the press who seem to have everything in place--huge house, well-decorated, etc., and I wanted to emphasize that large family life isn't always that ideal.

Large families don't always have every convenience; they don't always have 4 washing machines and 2 kitchens. They often make do with the same appliances that other families use-- and they live quite well anyway.

There was a time when there were 11 of us living in a house that was under 1000 ft2. It was a 3 bedroom, 1 bath house. There were not outbuildings, not even a garage. Everything we owned for the whole family had to fit in that tiny place.

The living room was 12x12ft., but we all fit. The dining room was 8x12ft., and housed our huge bookshelves, a dining room table, a and a small desk, and included all of our homeschool materials.

The kitchen contained the regular cupboards and appliances, plus our huge upright freezer and our washer and dryer.

We slept on a futon with our baby, and 3 children slept in one room, 5 in another. We learned how to do without dressers and to use every available space. Our furniture did not match--we often joked that it was "late Salvation Army". Our table was a cast off, and the living room furniture was a hodge-podge of garage sale finds, but we learned how to make everything presentable and beautiful. Cleanliness and the absense of clutter were our main allies.

Things were cramped--yes, but our children never seemed to notice. Even today the older children talk in glowing terms of all of the fun we had there. Since there wasn't much house to maintain, we had lots of time for other activities. We took the branches that fell from the trees outside and made "wickiups" (sp?) covered with blankets and acted like Indians. We painted on picnic tables outside without worrying about the mess. I sewed and sewed jumpers for all of the girls of the family. We read wonderful stories and played a lot. It was so easy to keep track of things. Our house was remarkably clean and tidy most of the time.

As the children were getting bigger, God opened a door for us to move to a 1500 ft2 house--it was like a mansion! It had 2 bathrooms, and even a den. By the time we left this house there were 14 of us. We had 4 in one room, 6 in another larger bedroom, and one in the den (the baby slept with us). Again, the children did not complain. Our house had spacious living areas, with wood flooring, a wood stove that kept us all warm, and plenty of play space with an additional sunporch for inclement weather.

Our current home has 6 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms, with 3 living areas and a separate school room and a loft office. We shopped 12 home builders before we found a house that was both cheap and big. It is not a lovely Victorian, it is actually quite plain, but we have added our touches here and there through Providential buys and finds. God has truly blessed us. Still, there are days when keeping all of these areas clean can be quite the operation--but it is so nice when the other kids stop by, or when someone needs to spend a week with us. There is always enough room.

The point of all of this is that, even when we did not have everything we wanted, God always provided what we needed; even when it looked from the outside that we should not be welcoming children into our lives, we are so glad we did! We could never imagine being without any of them--and neither can their spouses or employers or the people they have impacted with their lives.

Despite all of the naysaying, tongue-wagging and finger-shaking, these children are precious blessings, gifts from God.

We trust, God supplies.

I am a contributor to "At the Well", where we are discussing ways to be more "motherly" today.
Come join us for some thoughtful discussion.

Sherry

A glimpse of our lives and carpeting for the large family--photos

Following is a report from last week, I just didn't want to publish it without pictures...

Yesterday was one that did not stop! Have you ever had a day that seemed like 3-in-1?

We started the day with cleaning, painting, and moving things around in preparation for the carpet that is being installed today due to the "great deluge" that happened a few weeks ago. It is amazing what you can find behind bookshelves--and how many egg boxes it takes to pack up all of your books--almost 30--and that doesn't include the basement.

We decided that we should repaint areas with the old carpet still in place, in case we messed up a bit here and there. I also took the opportunity to put up a border in the dining room--I just went to the garage and selected a beautiful embossed floral from my stockpile that I bought for just .25 a roll a few years back.

Since many hands make light work, we had the prep work done by the afternoon. Then we took our oldest son at home out for a date--he is such a great help to us that we wanted to reward him. He wore his grampa's cowboy hat, one of many that we have inherited, and we discussed the Ballantyne books he has read so far while we ate and enjoyed each other's company.

I stopped off at the grocery store on the way home and bought some muffins and frozen pizza in preparation for the next day of carpet installation.

We returned home to find that two older daughters, Grace and Anna, were visiting, along with fiancee Jordan and Jack the dog. David, the oldest of our boys, has been in Florida this week, so Anna was lonely. We all sat down to watch a 60's TV episode together, and Anna just cuddled between Daddy and I the whole time, alternating shoulders. She is such a sweet blessing, whenever she visits she is such a sparkle!

Grace and Jordan wanted some counsel from us, so Daddy and I spent a good hour or two with them, ending with prayer.

Then we went to bed--and since I don't sleep well at this stage of my pregnancy, and my husband is a bit of an insomniac, we stayed up and watched an episode of The Fugitive (we check these things out of our library--free entertainment that we pick and choose ourselves. It is an interesting study to see how our cultural morees have changed albeit these were still not totally Christian, since the airing of these shows).

This morning we woke early, ate our muffins, and finished up little things here and there. The installers came and have been at work. My oldest daughter called, the one with a two toddlers, and we talked. It seems she has been feeling pretty lousy as a mother because she has been trying to fit into everyone else's mold. She is a night person, just like her dad, but she has been expecting herself to operate like a morning person. So she torments herself lying in bed at night and not sleeping, then awakens early to a messy house feeling groggy, then denies herself a nap in hopes of falling asleep at night, and so goes the ugly process all over again. She has been fighting feelings of inadequacy and carrying a big burden for many weeks now.

I suggested that, instead of fighting how God created her, to work with it. So she is going to use her awake time at night to clean the house and get things ready for the next day, so that when she awakens early to send her husband off to work and spend time with the little ones in the morning, the house is in order and her meals are planned, etc. If she is able to keep her kids busy and happy, they should go down for a good nap, which will enable her to have a good hour or so to sleep as well. I have learned over the years that a good hour's worth of sleep in the early afternoon is worth 3 hours missed the night before. We hung up with great excitement and expectation--I am so hopeful for her! Just another reminder that we are all different, and that God uses us just where we are. (update--after my daughter relaxed, she finally started sleeping at night--PTL!)

The children have been watching the carpet installers from the bannister on the top floor. Faith, 5, is the most enthused. I had often prayed that we could replace the carpeting. We were forced to have a cheap carpet installed to begin with, and that was 7 years and many foot treads ago.

This time around we are installing commercial grade carpeting--the type they use in offices. I wanted to have this type originally. There are so many reasons this type of carpeting is better for large families. For one thing, it is stiffer and tougher. For another, there is almost no pile, so footprints don't crush it, keeping it looking new longer. We chose one that was multi-colored and had a slight texture, so that every little speck doesn't show. We have had this same type of carpeting installed in our basement for over 6 years and can attest to its longevity. For industrial use, the carpet is glued down, but it can be installed with a carpet pad, just like any other residential carpeting.

It is also some of the cheapest on the market--only costing .63 a square foot!--although this is not coming out of our pocket and is covered by our homeowner's insurance.

In just a few hours we should be able to put everything back in order--I can hardly wait.

Update--here are the photos:

This is the new carpet--commercial grade

This is the old--worn out!

This is an "after", with the new border that cost me .75. Note the chandelier that cost us $20, the table we bought a few years back for $300--it was the longest we could find and will sit 16 of us, albeit a little bit crowded. We had the benches made about 10 years ago, and I covered them with some batting and vinyl. The rounded cabinet we found with its doors off, so we got it for a song and fixed it up. It houses my sewing machine, some cloth and notions, with my sewing basket on the side. The curtains we came across at a time when the home improvement store was reducing inventory--$3 a panel.

This is an "after" picture.

This is the "before picture"--quite a contrast! Our table was too big to move, so they chose to work around it.

A psalm for the times

Discouragement is a dastardly thing. It is one of the luxuries I can't afford.

But discouragement is one of the enemy's best tools. When we become discouraged, the courage is taken out of our hearts and we begin to feel as though there is no hope, that we will be overtaken and lose the war.

The Israelites became discouraged when they faced the desert without food and water, and the Red Sea with the Egyptians chasing them. When it was time to enter the promised land, they became discouraged because of the sheer numbers and size of the Canaanites.

So they succumbed, over and over. They complained and they blamed and they even wept loudly all night (how did God stand it?).

A wise man once said that just because a report is "accurate" doesn't mean that it isn't also evil.

We are facing unsure economic times--there is a major auto company offering to take back cars sold if in the next year one's income is lost--planning for failure. We are in unsure political times--who knows how the current regime will "help" us.

The greenies and responsibly religious among us have decided that having more than 2 children is "disgusting" and "selfish"--forgetting the fact that God loves people, and lots of them!

Discouragement wants a place in our hearts and minds.

But Joshua and Caleb saw through discouragement. They refused to be intimidated by the "what if's". Scripture says that Caleb followed the Lord "whole-heartedly"--without reservation or trying to figure things all out.

When I see the evil all around, and feel way-laid by the negatives, Psalm 37 soothes my soul and makes me laugh and cry and lift a smile to Heaven.

Fret not thyself because of evildoers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity.

For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb.

Fretting is a monstrous thing. To fret is to worry, and to worry is to visit and mull over a negative or fear continually, like a ravenous wolf trying to wear down his prey.

Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.

I love Spurgeon's commentary on the Psalms, The Treasury of David. He says that doing good is the best remedy for fretting--and it is so true! When I am sure that worry wants to rule me, I begin to concentrate on doing good, and so I don't have the time or room in my life for such nonsense. It is amazing as I have put this principle into practice so many times in my life that I see God unfold His special provision in marvelous ways.

Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

This is the verse that is so often misplaced. People are drawn to the words "he shall give thee the desires of thine heart", but miss out on the best part of the passage, "Delight thyself in the LORD". The blessing is in the delighting, the enjoying of God as if He were the most delectable desert, the most precious of friends, the sweetest part of life. Funny how enjoying God makes everything else seem superfluous.

Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.

Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass.

Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil.

For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the LORD, they shall inherit the earth.

For yet a little while, and the wicked shall not be: yea, thou shalt diligently consider his place, and it shall not be.

But the meek shall inherit the earth; and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.

With so many voices screaming loudly in the media with threats and accusations and evil boasts, it is easy to become angry. We want to defend ourselves, we want to "do likewise". But we must remember the paradox; to live is to lose, to trust is to win.

As King David was retreating from the usurpation of his rebellious son Absolom, a man pelted him with rocks and insults. His men wanted to cut off the insulter's head, but instead David said, "...let him alone, and let him curse; for the LORD hath bidden him. It may be that the LORD will look on mine affliction, and that the LORD will requite me good for his cursing this day." And so we must trust that God is in control, and if we are treated unjustly, He keeps the books.

The wicked plotteth against the just, and gnasheth upon him with his teeth.

The LORD shall laugh at him: for he seeth that his day is coming.

The wicked have drawn out the sword, and have bent their bow, to cast down the poor and needy, and to slay such as be of upright conversation.

Their sword shall enter into their own heart, and their bows shall be broken.

Evil men have to rage and scream and throw huge, public fits because it is all they have to work with. They only have themselves and their own piddly ideas. One cannot create infinity with a finite mind. Their intentions may be good, they may even believe they are helping people, but the outcome is evil, simply because it is devoid of God, of His leading and His purpose. That is after all the definition of evil--the absense of God. We pray for these unfortunates, because they are doomed. When we see them for what they trully are we can no longer be filled with fear and anger, but with pity.

A little that a righteous man hath is better than the riches of many wicked.

For the arms of the wicked shall be broken: but the LORD upholdeth the righteous.

The LORD knoweth the days of the upright: and their inheritance shall be for ever.

They shall not be ashamed in the evil time: and in the days of famine they shall be satisfied.

But the wicked shall perish, and the enemies of the LORD shall be as the fat of lambs: they shall consume; into smoke shall they consume away.

What words of hope! They shall not be ashamed in the evil time: and in the days of famine they shall be satisfied.

One can only store up so much food or stuff so many dollars into the mattress. Food eventually goes bad and money may lose its value and become as common as toilet paper. But God's promises are worth more than any hording we might undertake to prepare for the future.

Take these words and chew on them--let them feed your mind and your soul with a sureness that can not be shaken.

The wicked borroweth, and payeth not again: but the righteous sheweth mercy, and giveth.

For such as be blessed of him shall inherit the earth; and they that be cursed of him shall be cut off.

If we are able to put away fear, then we will also become more generous, even in dark times.

The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way.

Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the LORD upholdeth him with his hand.

Recently we experienced a great deluge in our house--a flooding toilet that did not stop for almost 2 hours. We did not have money to clean or take care of anything and were tempted to despair, but today we just put the final touches on the restoration, with new carpet no less, and without a penny of cash spent (our carpet was so worn it had holes and piles of dirt underneath--they don't usually replace carpeting, but God gave us favor).

My washer wore out completely last week, and we don't have the money to buy another front-loader (can you imagine my family without a washing machine?), but my dad left me his--the exact same model--and it was just sitting in my garage waiting to be hooked up. We were not utterly cast down--God was upholding us.

What sort of attacks will we see in the future? Perhaps physical attacks from officials or neighbors or relatives, but even though it may look like we are losing, we still win--we just need to read the end of the Book to find that out.

I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread.

He is ever merciful, and lendeth; and his seed is blessed.

These are God's words, and He does not lie. I live by what He says, not what I hear from the news or what I see with my eyes.

Depart from evil, and do good; and dwell for evermore.

For the LORD loveth judgment, and forsaketh not his saints; they are preserved for ever: but the seed of the wicked shall be cut off.

The righteous shall inherit the land, and dwell therein for ever.

If you have been tempted to do evil because you have been so pressed, give it up. Stay on the side of blessing.

The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

The law of his God is in his heart; none of his steps shall slide.

The wicked watcheth the righteous, and seeketh to slay him.

The LORD will not leave him in his hand, nor condemn him when he is judged.

Wait on the LORD, and keep his way, and he shall exalt thee to inherit the land: when the wicked are cut off, thou shalt see it.

The only way to win this war is in the battles fought in our hearts and minds. We cannot fight with our own intellect--we need to stay in God's Word and speak these words forth to others. We have God's promise that none of our steps shall slide.

I have seen the wicked in great power, and spreading himself like a green bay tree.

Yet he passed away, and, lo, he was not: yea, I sought him, but he could not be found.

We need to stop paying attention to what those in the limelight are saying and doing. Yelling at the TV doesn't accomplish anything. Even according to current wisdom, these people will vanish after their 15 minutes of fame are over--sort of like the "pet rocks" of the 70's.

Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright: for the end of that man is peace.

Ah, peace. What a goal to shoot for!

But the transgressors shall be destroyed together: the end of the wicked shall be cut off.

But the salvation of the righteous is of the LORD: he is their strength in the time of trouble.

And the LORD shall help them, and deliver them: he shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in him.

Are these troubled times?-yes. Are the wicked going after the righteous?-yes. But God has seen this pattern over and over, and He is not intimidated. We just need to trust and believe--He takes care of the rest.

We can dwell above it all and offer the precious gift of a peaceful heart and mind to those we love--especially our precious husbands and children.

Encouraging interview

I just discovered this encouraging interview from Priests For Life of a mother who had 20 children, the youngest being 22 in 2002. I was blessed as I read it, as it confirms what God has been teaching us, and also by the joy that exudes from this dear woman.

God knows

Babies don't ruin the world. They aren't superfluous, they are necessary.

The six-billionth baby was not born in crowded Calcutta, or even in a modern maternity ward in Denver. The six-billionth baby was born in the heart of God, and every hair of his head is numbered, and God knows all of his days and loved him enough to pay for the child's redemption with His life.

Worrying about how people impact the world is ridiculous. The world was made for people, not the other way around.

I am always incredulous at the the amount of human beings saying there are too many of us, arguing the population should be suppressed in favor of loving "Mother" earth. I wonder the connection has never been made that each person protesting the birth of more people is declaring herself to be part of the problem.

Children born to large families are not merely numbers, they are individuals with unique destinies and purposes. Just because I have 14 children does not mean I take any one of them for granted. The preciousness of each is indelibly imprinted on my heart. I can differentiate between their voices, even as they become adults. I pay attention to their likes and dislikes, the way they think, and God's call on each life.

Outsiders might think of my children in terms of numbers, and believe that any past 2 were too many, but if they were to become acquainted with each one, which of them would they consider a "mistake"?

A lot of people think large families are fine "as long as"...

My husband came from a large family and lived in abject poverty when he was a child. Please don't tell me he should never have been born--please don't declare that children ought never to be born to single mothers or to families who are poor. Please don't declare people are the best judges of who should be allowed to live.

And don't judge and point fingers at large families. Don't assume you know what goes on in our lives. Don't accuse us of neglect or narcissistic insanity. Explaining how a large family works to an outsider is like explaining marriage to a single person--you have to experience it to understand it. Lots of times I don't even understand the whole thing myself, but I know it is beautiful, because it is not about worldly materialism, it is about eternal treasure.

Those sitting in on talk shows and news programs, and even the PhD's who are asked to give their opinions don't have a clue. The officials in China and Italy and Singapore thought they knew, but now they are sure they don't. Their meddling in the whole equation is not turning out like they thought it would. Their projections did not take everything into account, and now they are wondering what to do. They do not understand how to fix things, but there is One who does.

God knows. Let's let Him have His way with life. After all, He is the Author.

Simplifying homeschooling

Here is a link to a great article to supplement my post on table time.

Ten Ways to Simplify Homeschooling

Table time

We just love old books!

I love this time of year! No holidays to plan for, and no summer vacations, just lots of leisure time to enjoy learning together!

I also love Marilyn Howshall's idea of "table time"--the time when we sit down and concentrate on skills that children need for learning. This is the "reading, writing, and arithmetic" part of our homeschooling. The rest of our hours are spent in what I have coined as "Curriculum Vitae"--the course of life, which may include all sorts of things that human beings need to know, from how to walk with God, to how to get along with others of all ages and in all circumstances (much better than "socialization"), to how to bake a cake, to how to paint and repair a home, to the history of Russia, to how to soothe a toddler, and on and on and on (for more on these ideas, go check out the Homeschool Oasis site--full of good encouragement and refreshing ideas).

I love discovering ways to educate children at superior levels with little or no money. There are so many, many things on the Internet that are both free and high quality. I have found some great resources for our academic time this year. The first being the most helpful. I have all sorts of levels of readers and writers, but this group of children coming up has really needed some good foundational phonics, since they are not intuitive with words as much as some of the older ones were--and I wish that I had found this resource earlier for the ones who weren't :/

I found a wonderful book through An Old Fashioned Education in the reading basics category. It is entitled, Word Mastery, a Course in Phonics for the First Three Grades". This book is totally free and I appreciate DonPotter.net for making it available. I have printed a copy out and placed it in page protectors in a 3-ring notebook. It covers just about everything a person would need to know about phonics and spelling in about 100 or so lessons, with periodical reviews. It isn't glossy or fluffy, just full of really meaty brain food. I would recommend, however, that a child have at least a basic understanding of the phonics sounds and how words work--the children I am using this program with have all had good doses of "Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons".

Each session I copy down the words from a lesson on the board, we discuss the phonics rule being introduced, each child reads the list aloud, and then we have a 20-word spelling "test"--and I use this word loosely, because it is hardly a test at all, I just pick random words from the master list and the children write them down, although everyone helps everyone else to spell them correctly. The idea is not to get a good grade on the test, but to understand the idea being presented as well as possible. I also dictate a sentence made from the words on the list--instructing and emphasizing proper grammar, and helping each child to make sure they get it right so that there is very little correction later. The kids seem to love it and often request we do two lessons at a time--although I feel doing one lesson at a time gives them a greater opportunity to make each concept part of their thinking.

Another resource I have begun using that lays a good foundation is Michelle's Math. I've tried a lot of different math programs over the years, and I am tired of most of them. What works, and what children need, is a way to think about numbers and arrange them logically in one's mind. Everyone is different, of course, but pointing out some of these patterns is a helpful beginning. I and my children have become frustrated with curriculum that is disorganized or assumes that a child understands math from a certain perspective. Some of us have an uncanny way of organizing things immediately, while others take a little more work.

For instance, two of my oldest children think about numbers for fun, whenever they have a spare moment. My oldest son would come home from his cart-pushing job at a local store and head straight for the computer, where he would plug in a physics equation he had been thinking about all day! My fourth daughter is the same way, and loves doing math in her head. My second daughter, on the other hand, avoids even thinking about math concepts at all costs. I wish I had taken more time to help her explore the patterns of math.

I have used some of Michelle's ideas and added my own, requiring the children "journal" the patterns as we explore them. Going back to this basic level sometimes jars the thinking loose of an older child that has hit a brick wall and can't seem to grasp some of the higher, more abstract ideas.

We don't take a lot of our day to complete these tasks, and we don't do them every day, but we do them regularly and sequentially, which is important.

Past this, there are all sorts of other resources, which I discuss here.

Praying that your homeschooling is blessed,

Sherry

I'm every woman

The chorus of a song has been going through my head--I don't know where I have heard it lately, probably in a grocery store.

"I'm every woman, it's all in me..."

What a boast--"I'm everything, I have it all. I can climb those mountains, kick the bad guys, and then come home and kiss my man and my babies--I can do it all--I am a goddess."

Then I think of this feminism thing--the thing that I hate. And I filter through my limited knowledge of history, and I find that feminism is not new. It goes farther back than the marches of the 60's and 70's, it goes farther back than Marx, it goes farther back than Margaret Sanger, it goes past Susan B. Anthony, and Cleopatra, and even Jezebel, the darling of feminism.

I see that feminism started in a garden. I see a woman standing before a tree--wanting to be wise, wanting to have it all. If I look intently at the woman, I see that she is awfully familiar. I am shocked when I discover that this woman, the one who cursed the whole human race, looks like me.

Feminism is not new. Feminism is old, old, old. It has been relived and retold throughout the centuries of mankind. It is in me, and it is in you. It is the lie, it is the "Lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh and the pride of life".

It is the original sin--"I will be like God".

I cannot remake myself. I cannot be good enough. I cannot wear enough pretty dresses or cook well enough or have enough babies to make up for it. Inside of me she still exists--that person that wants to control and "have it all". And the war between what I want to become and what I truly am makes me miserable.

I need Jesus.

He was God, but He laid His deity down. He lived in heaven, where there is no heat or cold or smelliness or exhaustion or crabby people, and He chose to be born in a dung-filled barn. He didn't force His way or beguile His way or make people feel awful to get what He wanted. He gave up what He wanted.

He is what I want--I want to be like Him. But I cannot think my way out of my mess, and I cannot read or write or beat my body into submission. I can only trust. I can only change my gaze from myself to Him.

And then the miracle happens. Then it is no longer about my performance or my piety, it is about His goodness, and His love and His mercy.

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. Matthew 11:28-29

Praying rest for you today.

Sherry

Diapers and government assistance

I have received two good questions that I would like to address.

First, cloth vs. disposable diapers.

I used to use cloth diapers, back when I had three children, 3 and under. It was a great way to save money and made a lot of sense for me. My life was pretty uncomplicated, except for the children themselves. I only had one bathroom, and very few loads of laundry, compared to today! At one point I had to roll my washing machine over to the sink and hook it up for each load, and I didn't even have a dyer or an outside line, just 2 clothes wracks that I hung all of our clothes and diapers on right there in our apartment. I did wash as soon as there was a load, and I didn't get behind. It was nice not to have to depend on the grocery store and wads of money. There was also something very satisfying about washing and diapering my babies this way.

Fast forward a number of years later...

I must say that I am so very thankful for disposables! Gone are the days when I could keep up on my wash so easily! We have one washing machine that is on almost constant duty--we do an average of 4 loads a day. As of this writing, the main bearing in the old machine (a front-loader) is almost totally destroyed, and we are awaiting new parts so that it can be replaced.

Besides all of the other complications of life as the mother of many very active children, with the older ones popping in and out of our lives--disposables just give me a little more breathing room! Frugality is good as long as it serves me, not the other way around.

Secondly, I want to address the question of accepting government assistance.

I have heard arguments for both sides of this issue. First of all, a person who accepts aid has not left the faith or even lost his/her faith. Secondly, in my humble opinion, people who look down on those who have had to accept assistance may be suffering from ignorance, pride, fear or stinginess.

Ignorance, because it is taken for granted that every family accepting assistance is immoral and abusing some sort of drug--legal or otherwise. This is not always true, and should never be assumed.

Pride, because folks who have never faced a financial or other sort of calamity honestly believe they could never be reduced to that state, and therefore look down the nose at anyone who has.

Fear, because they don't want to deal with the possibility that bad things can happen to good people, so they pigeon-hole anyone who reminds them of their own vulnerability to life's uncertainty.

Stinginess, because they do not want to see anyone to have anything extra--especially if it helps people to have more babies that they might have to help feed--read my post about this here.

Now, don't get me wrong--I do not believe that it is the government's place to redistribute wealth. It should be the place of individuals and churches to care for the poor and needy--but we do not live in a world that practices this. God made provisions in the law for the poor--with gleaning being the primary way needs were met. Today people, and especially churches, count on the government to help the needy--just call a church office and ask them what they counsel people to do--sign up for government help.

Then we could consider the change in attitudes towards rewarding men as the breadwinners. It used to be that employers could award a little extra to fathers responsible for families without suffering any sanctions. Feminism has done away with this consideration. Divorce and demands for "equal pay" have made it harder for responsible, married couples to raise children on one income, not to mention the increasing tax burden we must all pay for "forced charity".

As for medical aid, there was a time when medical treatments were affordable for the average person. Where medical bills mounted, they were paid off in increments. For those who were destitute, every hospital had an "indigent ward", and it was considered part of private charity. Then the government decided it would get involved, and costs began to rise. Private insurance also had its part to play. Charges increased because the element of the free-market was removed. Today many feel as though they have few options. Pharmaceutical companies charge Americans exorbitant prices for their goods as compared to what is charged for the same products in other parts of the world where the free market is allowed to operate.

Even before signing up for an indigent care program, an individual must show proof that they do not qualify for a federally-funded medical program. There are medical share programs, and these are a viable option, but there are those with existing and on-going problems who do not always qualify. Many feel that they are being forced to sign up for these programs--and these programs will lead to many evils, but what can the individual do against such a monster, besides vote his conscience?

During the Great Depression, parents had to feed their children, and so either they forgot their pride and stood in line for bread, or their babies cried from hunger--do we consider them to be poor parents or Christians because they sacrificed their own self-respect for those they loved? Some that did not have assistance were reduced to theivery. During these times a sheriff pursued a man who had stolen a sack of flour. This man brought the flour home to his wife and children, who were so hungry they were stealing uncooked dough before their mother could bake it. The sheriff could not bring himself to arrest the poor father.

There is a danger here, and one that must be considered. Many government programs can give the officials reason to begin to interfere with one's family life--just as Nancy Pelosi recently wanted family planning to be attached to such aid. WIC is one such program which I would be careful about.

In the end, one must follow God. What is not permissible for one may be just fine for another. This is not a question of sin--in fact it may take more humbling and faith for someone to accept help, and perhaps God is doing an internal work that goes beyond the specifics of the situation. There also may be another person who has become lethargic from dependence on outside help, and God is doing a different type of internal work by preventing them from applying for assistance.

If you are certain in your heart that God is not convicting or condemning you, then do not allow yourself to accept the stygma associated. Ignore the opinions of others and forge ahead with your head held high--treating yourself and the officials with which you may be dealing with great respect. But if God wants you to hold out and trust Him, don't listen to the outside voices that are so unwilling to offer any real help, but are pressing you to continue in your dependence.

And never, never judge anyone standing in line at the store with a WIC check or food stamps. Treat them as you would Jesus.

Question of couponing

Some have asked me about couponing--I have previously written my thoughts on the subject here.

Large family financing

It seems that all the news is bad. We are being told that this is the worst economy since the Depression.

But it's not true.

Those of us who have lived a little and have good memories can tell you--there have been worse economic times--and only within the past 30 years or so. Actually, I can remember that the economy in the 70's was so bad that a lot of ministers were saying that Jesus was at the door, and were agreeing with the progenitors of the "population bomb" and the environmentalist wackos that the earth was going to become a great cesspool full of starving humanity before the year 2000.

But somehow we all lived through those times--much past past "doomsday" in fact.

Jesus is definitely at the door, but that does not mean that we should automatically expect personal disaster, and begin wringing our hands and fearing.

It is always good to remember that, although we get used to hearing people lumped into numbers and placed into categories, God does not work that way. He writes each person's story individually.

Cambodia was a country filled with fear during the final days of the Viet Nam conflict. The Khmer Rouge was roving the country with its destruction. A group of Christians gathered in a home to pray. While praying, fire swept through their entire community, composed of raised thatch huts built closely together. Every other home was burnt to the ground, but the hut containing God's faithful ones was not touched!

There is another economy--God's economy.

I used to have $400 dollars a month to feed 11 of us--including paper products. I would plan as much as I could, making a list of meals and snacks and sticking to that list as I shopped. I knew the prices of every item, so I was able to calculate almost to the penny before I even entered the store. Still, I would pray and trust that God would stretch every dollar I spent.

Amazingly, when my purchases were added at the register, I often came out ahead--with extra money! And my van was filled with all sorts of wonderful and healthy things to eat. We always had everything we needed, and we never went hungry.

Many people have told us we should not be able to afford all of our children--they marvel at what God has been able to accomplish with our little bits here and there. Our bottom line does not leave room for things like home improvements and even clothing. But what is misunderstood is that it is not about the money, it is about the blessing. It is about God blessing us with opportunities and His favor.

Without God's favor, my $10 at the store is practically worthless, but with God's favor, I can arrive at the store just in time for a sale, or some discontinued items marked down to fit into my budget.

A new chandelier hangs over our dining room table. We had wanted one for a while, since the old one gave out hardly any light, and made our dining table virtually useless at night. The retail price for the type we desired was over $150--way beyond our means.

One day we were driving home and stopped at a garage sale about 3 blocks from our house. A gentleman who was an electrician for a local home builder was selling all of his overstock of lighting fixtures for new homes--and so we were able to buy the chandelier of our hearts' desire for $20!

Having all the money we need to buy anything we want is no fun at all! Being dependent on God makes life an adventure. The naysayers that feel as though they have to "help" us will never understand this aspect of single-income, large family living--but this is at the heart of what we do. It is about the surrender of everything we are and ever hope to have. We become practicers of what everyone on TV is always preaching.

I have a sneaking suspicion that we not only shock and scare people who are deluded into thinking they actually have some sort of control over their lives, we shame them.

It is not really about having "stuff", it is about having more of Him--seeing His fingerprint in our every-day existence in unmistakable ways.

At the Well

Today is the kick-off of a nifty idea--a virtual gathering of women to encourage each other in the spirit of Titus 2. I am happy to announce that I will be writing for this group once a month.

Here are today's questions for a round table discussion:

When you read the Scripture found in Titus 2: 2-5, how do you see this playing out in your own life?

What are your areas of strength? Of weakness?

If you could set some sort of goal in relation to this Scripture, what would it be?

Even though I had been a Christian for a few years when I became a wife and mother, I had no idea what it meant to be God-ly. At first, trying to live out Titus 2 was like putting on an uncomfortable coat. But as the years have progressed and I have received healing, correction and genuine transformation, the coat has become part of me, like the skin on my body.


My area of strength? I guess it would be that I love, love, love to be a keeper at home. Home is my favorite place in the world.

My current area that I am being challenged in is my love for my husband. Not that I don't love him! But I just became accustomed to having things my way during the day, and lately we have been blessed with Daddy 24/7. I have found that there are still areas of surrender--and with the surrender comes great blessing as I see God moving in our family with blessings that could not have otherwise been realized.

My goal? Well, I guess you could say that I have Titus 2 roles to fulfill now--one as an older woman, the other as a mother of young children. Making sure that I fulfill the obligations at home to God's glory while still being available to others should never become a juggling act for me. I want everything to be done in order, according to His will, and not driven by "needs"--my own or outsiders'. My husband and children take first priority.

Let's face it--there are plenty of places to get together with women in "gripe groups"--At the Well gives us a chance to focus in on the truly important things and encourage one another. I hope you will be able to join us.

Sherry