Help!

"Help"! That's the desperate e-mail exclamation she sent to me, this mother of eight—half way around the world—with children ranging from 3-12 years of age.

Her church family was condemning, her house was a mess, her husband was not pleased.

I wanted to be there, to comfort and bless, but here I am in another hemisphere, only the world-wide web and a keyboard connecting the two of us.

But I know there are many, many others, on every continent, who feel very much the same way.

First, we must realize that we don't have to be "capable"—no Super Mom's allowed!

Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth.  But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.  God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. (1 Corinthians 1:26-29, NIV)

This club is not for the faint-of-heart—merely for those who understand that their only hope is in trusting God, like King David and all those uncelebrated sojourners found in the Faith hall of fame; the ones who pleased God and walked with Him in obedience by faith alone.

Next, call out to Him with all of your heart, tell Him everything, have a good cry—but don't remain there! We must repent (if necessary), then put on the garments of praise and simply make a new beginning. Let God's peace come.

6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)

Encourage yourself in the Lord—remember, He dwells with the lowly in heart, with those who are at their end. The Apostle Paul describes Him as the "God of all comfort". Imagine snuggling close to Him, like a chick nestled under the wing of its mother (Psalm 91). Even when he disciplines us—it is with love and not with condemnation.

You know, it only takes one touch of the Master—just a little glimpse of His face—and then everything falls into its proper perspective...

...then come to the realization that you have a wonderful job—an offering of very great importance to God.

You are the keeper of your home and its spirit. You are an artist with a broad canvas.

With His guidance what will you create? Will it be defeat and chaos—will you succumb to the lies of the adversary? Or will you rise up in the strength of the Lord and do battle?

Pray—that your arms will be strengthened. That your mind will be clear. That you will be lead by the Holy Spirit of God.

4Show me your ways, O LORD,

teach me your paths;

5guide me in your truth and teach me,

for you are God my Savior,

and my hope is in you all day long. (Psalm 25:4-5)

Believe—with David, "By my God, I can leap over a wall, I can run through a troop, I can bend a bow of bronze".

Make a start—by curtailing church and even homeschooling and begin focusing in on the biggest problems, one at a time.

Pitch—everything that clutters up your life; TV, computer time, telephone conversations, paper trash, things you are saving "for tomorrow", clothes that are "just slightly damaged" yet can't be repaired. Pair everything down to the essentials, then breathe a great sigh of relief!

Set short term goals that can be met and then get on a schedule—wake up even if you don't feel like it. Exercise too! Get disciplined. Pay attention to your appearance and dress appropriately. Remember how you used to prepare to meet your husband before you married him? Allow God to bring the results—keep your eyes on Him!

Don't let yourself hide from your duties by surfing the Internet and longing for someone else's life. Look closely at just where you live—really take it in and be like Pooh and "Think, think, think".

Get a vision for your home. Don't make it look like anyone else's home—rather, make it an expression of you, the way God created you, with the things you have in your hand (no comparing with others allowed).

Make a place for everything, and then put everything in its place—return each item after you use it.

Rearrange the furniture so that things look organized and comfortable to you and flow together better for the living you and your family do there.

Think of your husband as your "client". You are not just acting as a maid, but as a window dresser—creating artistic displays of love and solace in every room.

Wash the fingerprints from the walls and the windows. Scrub the floors, polish the furniture. Get serious about your cleaning and invest in some good tools (they don't have to be expensive--no gadgets!).

When your house is all shipshape, just sit and admire it—encourage your children to appreciate it along with you. Teach them how wonderful and peaceful it is to have order (remind them how frustrating it is to take an hour just to find a hair brush each morning, or a pencil, a book, or forks and spoons enough for dinner—tidiness is good for the mind and soul).

Let your feminine creativity flow in the kitchen—garnish your husband's dish and arrange it so it says with every bite, "I love you" (do you feel lacking in creativity?—tap into God's—He will show you. It's amazing how many women who are not creative at home have loads of it when working to impress an employer outside the home—remember that this is the most important job you will ever do!).

And make those kids behave—quit falling for that perverted thing we women sometimes call "love".  Refusing to give children secure boundaries because we are afraid they might feel hurt or rejected for a brief second is not the God kind of love—it is a selfish counterfeit. Tell them when they will rise, what they will wear, and what they will eat and do, and let them know that disobedience has consequences. Be impenetrable when it comes to things that count, but never, never sweat the small stuff—if the milk spills, smile and wipe it up—no need to take it out on a dear little one! Allow them room to be creative, but always keep in mind that even the mighty ocean has boundaries!

Show them what a real woman looks like by working beside them—working faster, better and harder than any female in any other profession in the whole world! If you have invested your sweat and blood into your home, you will live with great satisfaction! (and those extra pounds may just start sliding off...)

Then, after you are experiencing a bit of peace, slowly add some homeschooling time, and gradually even some time for church, but be willing to back off if things get out of order again.

Be diligent, thankful and cheerful, and you will have much less to bicker about, and soon everyone will rise up and call you blessed!