My daughter knows a lady who owns a number of daycare centers and has seen a lot of babies. She remarked one Sunday at church how very round my grandchildren's heads were, then explained she doesn't see that many babies in her business with round heads--their heads are flat due to laying in bed for long periods of time--not being held or played with.
This morning my dear husband and I were playing with our little baby. We were taking turns talking to her and kissing her, especially on her feet because she is so ticklish there and smiles and snickers, to our great delight!
Daddy asked me, "Who wouldn't want to play with and talk to their precious baby?" to which I replied that people are just so busy these days.
And we are busy. We are busy with our jobs, our hobbies, our volunteering. If we aren't busy, we are sure someone will notice, and what would they think?
How many times has someone called my husband up to invite him to something important--a men's prayer breakfast or something of the like. Of course he loves to be in God's will, to serve the Master in every way he can. But would he give up the chance to minister love to his dear children so that he can look like he's ministering to others?--never.
A long time friend just asked if he would like to be part of an intercessory prayer group this Sunday night--that's three hours out of his day--half hour there and back plus two hours praying. After a 60 hour week, he'd rather spend those three hours in prayer and Bible study with his kids, or maybe even sitting and listening to his 2-year-old describe her dollies, or correcting his older sons so they will treat their sisters with love and respect in preparation for marriage someday. This is every bit as holy in God's sight as sitting down with people and having intercessory prayer, as important as that is.
It is a sad reality around my minister friends. It's not enough to be a good family to them, and they only think I am legitimate because I have a "ministry" through this blog--silly, isn't it? But what brings a black eye to the church these days--isn't it that we are just as bankrupt when it comes to real living in the relationships we call "family"?
So we will be home a little bit more, and we will spend time together, tickling and giggling and sometimes bickering so we can find out what it means to have true love in the midst of conflict.
But we will take time to be a family, to God's glory and for His kingdom.
elcome! My name is Sherry and I am a devoted Christian wife and mother to 15 homeschooled children. 
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I'm new to your blog and have been enjoying what I see here. I just had my 10th child, 5th daughter. I have also noticed many flat headed or even lopsided heads on babies that spend too much time out of arms. That's one benefit of being in a large family. Our little girl hardly spends any time at all in her bassinette. Somebody is always standing in line wanting to hold her. Large families are truly a blessing of the Lord!
ReplyDeleteGod bless,
Becky in TN
www.blessed9x.blogspot.com
hehe, I get that compliment a lot about my kids too, but I babywear so I always assumed that is why! Anyhow, I am sorry your church family was upset, but you are completely right in your way of thinking as my husband and I feel the same way.
ReplyDeleteI also love holding my baby and can't imagine her being in a baby seat or crib all day. I love your comments about your husband ministering to his own family. I've personally seen a ministers's family suffer terribly because their dad was serving other people all the time.
ReplyDeleteWelcome back! I've missed your down-to-earth, leading us back to what's really important. You're right, I see lots of young couples whose babies spend all of church in the carrier. I love holding my babies! And I can't imagine not doing it--even if they are sleeping, it's usually in my arms! You are truly a blessing to me!
ReplyDeleteI love what you said. It is so true. Thank you so much!
ReplyDeleteWe have round headed babies too! Your post is sooo true! So sad that sometimes "life" gets in the way of people seeing the most important things that we should spend our time and devote our energy to! I was telling the Lord the other day that I wish I was the mother I am now to my first 2 when they were born. He sweetly replied to me, that he is not finished with our family yet, and that I will have plenty of time for him to show me how what the enemy stole from me then, he will return to me moreover! The baby is getting so big!
ReplyDeleteMay God bless you!
ReplyDeleteok, so i went back and read this post again! It is just the thing that has been on my heart lately! Out of comfort zones for most though!
ReplyDeleteYou're back! Your baby is so precious! People (church friends included) have scolded me for holding my children too much. I also baby-wear (even still w/ my almost 2 yo) and I get comments all the time. Why is having children who are attached to their parents considered a negative thing?
ReplyDeleteI am glad you and your husband are making decisions that benefit your family - ministering to them is every bit as important (probably more so) as church.
Glad you're back :)
I am glad to see you here agian. Also glad to know that you aren't here all the time and you are spending so much precious time with your teeny tiny one. We have our newest baby now. She is two weeks old. I love to hold her and between me and her daddy and her three siblings she won't have a chance to get a flat head! I have even seen helmets that they sell to prevent flat head. Its sad that we are too busy to hold our own precious tiny babies!
ReplyDeleteIt is sad that it is only considered worthwhile or real if it is for those outside of our families.
ReplyDeleteThey forget that our homes are filled with people that God has placed here and that He has given them to us to disciple, nurture, love...Hopefully to bring them to a mature faith in Christ.
Blessings to you and your family.
I am new to your blog, but have been eagerly awaiting your return this month...I do agree that so many people are too busy, but like you said it is often something "important" that pulls people away. Thank you for this post, it helped to ground me and gave me a good perspective on what we have been busy with lately. Lots of good things pull at us, but the most important things are the sweet blessings of family. I want to spend my days enjoying them and I shouldn't feel like I need to make excuses for that!
ReplyDeleteIt is a sad fact that many think that ministry outside of the home is more important than their own family. I think that the family is THE ministry. If God gives us children - they are our first ministry. I am supposed to be my husbands first ministry. So I totally agree with your post.
ReplyDeleteps. I have round headed babies too. :)
Round-headed Ergobabies here, too! My husband is an ordained minister, though he is no longer working in a church. Our last church was a horrible experience where our children were taunted for being homeschooled and I was "counseled" severely for not doing enought outside ministry. My husband was instructed as to how to get me to submit, for surely *he* wanted me out there "winning souls for Christ." The truth was, I *was* winning souls for Christ. I am not the least bit bitter about that time, though, for it galvanized our family and our vision. That time led us out of the seeker-sensitive, popularity driven way of doing church to something much more meaningful.
ReplyDeleteI was so happy to see a new blog post of yours! Thank you for taking the time to update us. Your blog is such a blessing.
So True!
ReplyDeleteA church that divides the family is not a godly church!
It seems that the godly are being pushed out of the churches while the hypocritical are running a rampage in the pulpits and seats.
Good to see you back! A much needed reminder because even today in Christiandom we are spiritually bankrupt as families--we need to awake from our slumber and reclaim our families!
ReplyDeleteMany blessings...
When we had the midwife visiting after our little Arwen was born we were also commented on her round head.
ReplyDeleteBut she rarely also is out of anyones arms and spends most of her time being carried or played with.
The only down side is she is 7 months old and dosen't spend enough time on the florr to roll over or sit up yet.
But with 10 brothers and sisters it is a bit hard not to be doted on by everyone.
We also have always believed that the family and family life is a huge calling form God and that it shoud be honoured as much as any other calling.
God Bless
I hadn't been reading long before your last dear baby was born and you took a needed break - but boy was it nice to read this post. Our family struggles with this as well - and I have been surprised by the way we are sometimes treated by some of the wonderful people at church who make different choices than we do - as if we are neglecting God's work when we aren't at the church building for every meeting or project. We feel exactly as you do: our mission field right now is at home with our adorable blessings. Lord willing, there will come a time when our home is less full and the Lord may call us to some other projects - but only, I believe, if we prove faithful in the one He has already laid before us.
ReplyDeleteI am so glad to see you back and thankful to be blessed by your counsel regarding families and the place of ministry in the home, specifically, as this has weighed on my heart over the past few weeks.
ReplyDeleteI agree that in many churches nowadays there is a real de-emphasis on the crucial ministerial role that the mother and father are to play to their children - and how that, in turn, blesses the church, the community, and glorifies God every bit as much as any other outreach (and perhaps even more, as He blessed us with these little souls deliberately and we are held accountable for training them up in His way).
I commend you and am encouraged that my family isn't alone in pulling away from some external ministry opportunities because we feel a stronger calling to focus on our family. Your words are really an encouraging affirmation for me, as they frequently have been, and I look forward to seeing more of your ministry here on the web in the future (and how wonderful, that even in your blogging the main emphasis of your words is still centered on worshipping God in one's home!).
Thank you, bless your family, and welcome back!
Like you I have round headed babies. I barely let them go! I have also been complimented on how cuddly my babies are, they even lean into strangers and occasionally will rest their head on someone's chest. So beautiful! I think they just know they can trust whoever is holding them.
ReplyDeleteI am glad to hear you like tickling your baby too. With 4 children now I thought this baby would miss out on my time, especially with housework and homeschooling so I make an effort to take him to the bedroom and just play all over my bed, tickling and wrestling and blowing raspberries, for 15 minutes or so once or twice a day.
Best wishes
Jen in Oz
My midwife has commented in a similar fashion to me, too, that our babies heads are so nice and round. I have noticed when I am helping out in our church nursery that most of the little babes there have flat heads at the back. I do feel bad for them, but sadder for their mamas and daddies who are missing out on drinking every drop of their sweet babyhood. Of course, it is easy for those of us in large families to have babies with nice, round heads as there is always someone who wants to hold a baby. :)
ReplyDeleteI must admit that I used to be one of those women who chided others for holding their baby too much, but as I've grown in my relationship with Christ and as a mother, I've come to realize the importance of it. I used a baby sling for the first time with my 5th child. It was a little more difficult with the twins (because I always felt guilty that I could only wear one), but one of the other girls usually helped out. I am in search of a good wrap to use with the blessing we are expecting in December because I can't imagine going back to how I used to mother.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your constant encouragement!
Great post~
ReplyDeleteI know I to like to be at home with my family!
Warmly,
QF momma of 6 so far...and always prayin for one more blessing
Georgiann
First, your answers to the large family/homeschooling Q's were exceptional~*THANK YOU!* for taking the time to share your heart! Many do not do this enough. :)
ReplyDeleteSecond, I so appreciate your sharing about being home together more! Extra meetings takes away from our being able to disciple our children and our evening devotions and routines. We get a lot of criticism for this, but truthfully, if we were to win the world only to lose our children there would be no solace in that!!!! (((((HUGS))))) sandi