Know the "why's" of what you do

Why do we homeschool? Can we explain why we do what we do?

This is a very important point. Homeschooling is not just some arbitrary choice in the gamut of education--it is radical, some would even consider it dangerous. People don't do radical things without good reason. What are our reasons?

When I first kept my daughter home, it was because I was concerned about the influences of the public schools on her young mind, and I was also reticent to send such a tender little person into the wide, wide world. These are both good reasons, but they are very simple ones, ones that anyone could poke holes in.

All the time there were questions swirling around, questions about whether or not I cared enough about the unsaved world to send my little girl as a missionary, questions about whether or not I was smothering her and keeping her from developing by keeping her from her peers.

And then there were the academic questions; was I qualified to teach? Could I give her a quality education at home?

At the time I did not have the answers to these questions--I just knew in my gut that what I was doing was the right thing. I knew from the experiences of my own life that there had to be a better way, and I was willing to pioneer to find it.

So when a relative offered to pay my daughter's tuition at a private, Christian school, I had to decline. I couldn't coherently explain why, and there were little to no resources existing at the time that could help me come up with a plausible argument.

And this made me feel so uneasy that I have spent hours and hours exploring the "why's"--and I must tell you, they are LEGION!

The struggles I used to have with my own educational-eze ideas have dissipated over the years. The insecurities I used to have as to whether or not I was doing the right thing are long gone. Yes, I still live on the periphery of good sense, especially with some very dear friends, but I still love them, even if they don't always "get" where I am coming from. Here are some reasons:

1) I homeschool because God is the Creator, the Master, the Architect of life on planet earth, and He gave children to PARENTS--not officials or counselors or a "village". Even though I personally know that very few of us are actually qualified to deserve chidren, this is His plan--and even if it doesn't seem to "work" it is the best plan, because the Author said so, and because His purposes are higher than mine.

2) I homeschool because the alternatives are unacceptable. No one, and I mean NO ONE in the world loves and understands my child as I do--surrendering my child to anyone else is surrendering him to a person who looks at him as a "job" or a "number"--not a person with value and quirks and beauty. I would just ache inside to send my child into any environment where he wasn't treated as the gift, the jewel he is.

3) I homeschool because the world is such a detestable place. At school I don't have control over who gets on the bus with my child. I don't have control over who he gets as a teacher, or even the content of what he is forced to learn--even if it creates all sorts of conflict in his heart and mind when he knows what Daddy and Mommy say are in direct opposition with what is taught in the classroom. I can't keep him from being picked on, and then picking on others. I may never know just how much his little eyes see every day, how many times he is made to feel like trash, how bored senseless he is while being forced to learn things that are meaningless to him until he hates learning altogether.

But at home we are safe. Of course, even there we must deal with the selfishness that lies within him, as well as within me, but that is much easier than dealing with the immaturity and selfishness of a whole host of people. There will be a time when he will face the world, but only after he has had some time to harness his own sinful desires and find out who he is, apart from the crowd. Children who realize their own dignity, bought and paid for by a bleeding Savior, treat others with consideration, and know when to say "no!"

4) I homeschool because I want my child to understand work, pain and eternity. School distorts all of these concepts; work is only to gain a reward; pain is to be avoided at all costs, and the only things that count are today. My children understand that work is its own reward and therefore should be valued, that it is a wonderful remedy for many maladies, with or without a paycheck. They have realized that pain is often the best thing--that without it we would be missing some of the greatest miracles of all. They can go through any hardship, and see to the other side of any trial, because they look at life as a journey, not an end in itself.

5) I homeschool because it has given us all the connections that make life bearable on planet earth. School, with its draconian scheduling and expectations of nonsense, keeps people from having real experiences with real people and real things. My children have spent 24/7 with each other, and sometimes fought and had to come up with honest reasons to treat each other with respect and love--they had to put up with noise and interruptions and things like grocery shopping, studies, chores, etc. By limiting their entertainment options, they had to learn how to spend their time constructively. Instead of expecting everything they did to end up in meaningless busy-work, they loved making every minute count--and so they concentrated more on the people in their lives than the things, and realized that even unpleasantness can bring purpose and understanding to our lives.

On Sunday my older children, those who have grown up and moved away, descended on our house. They didn't come over to mooch or complain, they came over, on one of their rare times off, to take their younger siblings to the zoo and show them a good time. They wouldn't even let us pay for the tickets--and they do this often; they take their brothers and sisters with them to the store, or on short trips, or just over to play with toys they have been buying for them. They are often busy, at church especially, but they do this because they love to do it--because taking a 4yo to the public bathroom and changing a 2yo in the parking lot are things that are not considered hardships--they are part of what makes human beings valuable and worthy of the work and even the inconvenience.

And the list goes on...